In my experience as a traveler, and with friends who have travelled, people seem to make friends on their voyages – and not just friends for the voyage, but deep and long lasting friendships that transcend borders and barriers. These friendships are formed on the bases of shared experiences, and it is these shared experiences that act as the super glue that bonds people together. I am convinced that we are initially moved to make friendships so that we can share our experience with people we care about, and then we are compelled to maintain these friendships because of the secret treasures that these friendships represent.
My journey so far here in Ukraine is no exception to this idea of the Travelers Bond. I have been very lucky to share my journey with three wonderful people from Saskatoon : Christina, Sean and Mike. Unfortunately their stays in Ternopil are now over – Christina returned 2 weeks ago, Sean left yesterday, spent a night with Felix (a Toronto Layover) and is now heading back to Saskatoon, and Mike is hanging out in Lviv with family for two weeks and then heading home. And now after spending seven and a half weeks in their company, I am finding myself missing them in very specific ways…
What I’ll miss about Christina:
Christina was probably the most Ukrainian out of the four of us. She was raised in a Ukrainian household, with Ukrainian parents and grandparents who were determined to hang on to their cultural roots. Christina added a wonderful dynamic to the group because she knowledgeable about the country, the people and the culture. She knew where we should go and what we absolutely HAD to see – in fact it was because of her that we were finally able to go to the Carpathian Mountains as a group. Christina was interested in making the most of her visit to her “homeland” and that excitement and interest was definitely transferred to the rest of us. Chrstina was invaluable to all of us because she had the greatest command of Ukrainian language and was able to read us menus, and communicate with locals to ensure that we were taken care of. Christina had a way about her that made me want to always highlight the positives in every experience. I will miss Christina because she got me excited about being Ukrainian for 4 months. I wish her all the best in her studies and future…. What I will miss about Sean:
Sean is an interesting character who spent a lot of time on this trip sick. Sean is very introverted – he doesn’t like to talk very much. He is logical and calculated – studying to be an engineer. Sean is a devoted Catholic. Sean had this blunt way about him that could be jarring: he once said “your extreme niceness freaks me out a little bit…” Sean and I bonded over opposites. Our friendship had an adversarial layer to it that got both of us going. We discussed hot topics like judgment, stereotypes, pornography, and masturbation (me being a sexuality major and him being a catholic), we discussed morals, homosexuality, politics, abortion, birthcontrol and almost ever other possible controversial topic we could get our hands on. We disagreed on almost everything, but accept for one single occasion where the claws came out a little bit (and mainly just due to being hot and cranky, rather than being overly emotional about a topic), we were both able to maintain composure, observe patience, and use intellect and words rather than claws to navigate our differences. Sean taught me patience, he taught me to listen to someone with opinions so very different from my own. Meeting Sean was an interesting experience because I was given a view of life from a very very different lens than my own. Sean, unknowingly, urged me to be unjudging and accepting of difference (we disagreed on some very fundamental issues) and to see past a person’s beliefs to see more of the person. I will miss having this other perspective in my life, and I will really miss the intellectual and philosophical work out Sean gave me on an almost daily basis. I will miss Sean for the challenges. And then there’s Mike.
Mike’s parents would be proud to know they have raised a true gentleman. On one of our outings I told mike he was a gentleman and Mike replied “I took a book out from the library on being a gentleman…. Actually I don’t think I ever returned it…” I laughed incredible hard at the irony of it all. Mike is incredibly well cultured. He is accepting and tolerant, and knows how to turn a challenging situation into a wonderful opportunity to laugh. Mike and I share deep, soul connecting conversations about live, and love and family. Although we were kind of tipsy and engaged in some random activity, I was truly honoured to be with Mike when he found out that his grandfather passed away; it was nice to be there as a friend, and an honour to be leaned on (although he didn’t do much leaning). I will miss the understanding that the end of every day must be punctuated by a beer (and usually icecream too). I will miss hunting for a Ukrainian wife with Mike; I will miss the great conversation, the sharing of musical tastes, and our shared gutter mind. I really hope that if we are ever in each other’s cities, or even provinces, we will be able to connect once again and strengthen the travelers bond that we have created. It has been wonderful to know the three of you, and I thank you for helping to enrich my experience of Ukraine by just being with me through my journey, and allowing me to join you on yours!!
And then there was one…
*love*
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